While taking a firm stance against bullying, The Ridge School also looks deeper into the causes of such behaviour and how we can work together with families to bring out positive changes rather than destructive ones. Magic words such as “hello”, “please”, “I am sorry”, and “thank you” are learned at home five years before a child begins school. This behaviour is then reinforced, not taught for the first time, at school. It is also at home that children learn to be honest, clean, punctual, diligent, sympathetic and respectful.
Language, mathematics, and sciences are taught at school to equip the children with skills, principles, and critical thinking abilities for the real world. All these lessons need collaborative effort to ensure that they are well established, and the same goes for anti-bullying education.
For example, teaching your son how to operate a dishwasher or clean his room before he gets an iPad will help develop a strong intrinsic sense of self-discipline and good behaviour, which is the desired outcome of this partnership between families and schools. Recent studies show that more than 58% of South African school-goers have experienced some form of bullying, so how can we reduce this number by working together?
What We’ve Learned From Neuroscience
According to research published in Social Cognitive and Affective Neuroscience, boys who bully their peers tend to display a different pattern of brain function in response to certain facial expressions.
“Higher amygdala activity to angry faces could suggest that these boys are more sensitive to signals of anger from other people, while lower amygdala activity to fearful faces could suggest that their brains are less responsive to signals of distress, which could lead to lower empathy when bullying victims.”
Environment Makes A Difference
Research has shown that a healthy partnership between parents and teachers is essential for success in education and discipline. Every child’s approach and response to a teacher reflects what he hears at home. If teachers are spoken of negatively in the home, then all lines of respect are erased. To ensure good discipline, the school needs to be an extension of the home environment, and the home needs to be an extension of the school. Families have an important role to play when it comes to instilling discipline.
One example of this is having a healthy sleep routine at home in order for your son to have successful days at school. Sleep is the most important thing a child can do to be emotionally prepared for self-regulation at school the following day.
So, What Can We Do About Bullying?
The psychological and physical safety of every boy is most important. Protecting this safety means every boy knowing that he must never cross the line of physical harm or hurtful speech. This line needs to be taught at home and reinforced at school. Reporting incidents of bullying will set in motion a series of events that are designed to bring correction.
These interventions have proven to be successful in practice, but where bullies are resistant to change, the consequences escalate, and expulsion from the school may be required. Here are steps that parents and teachers can take:
- Listen to the boys and take the matter seriously.
- Bring both parties together and lead a discussion between them along the following lines:
- What did you do?
- Why did you do it?
- What were you thinking at the time?
- What have you thought about since?
- What can you do to correct the behaviour now?
- What can you do to ensure that this does not happen again?
- Formally record the incident and have repeat follow-up sessions.
The Ridge School views bullying in a very serious nature and our Code of Conduct will give specific details about the detailed process we will follow in a case of bullying to ensure that it does not become prevalent. To enquire about bullying prevention or report an incident, contact The Ridge School on 011 481 5800.
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